Bracebridge Battered!
Despite the vast majority of the team nursing monstrous hangovers from last nights frivolity in Mansfield, the Sunday XI turned in an inspired performance to record a 7 wicket hiding over Bracebridge Heath.
Captain Streaky said he lost the toss & we had to field (nobody was really sure whether a toss actually took place & Streaky just imagined it all!). The usual motivational teamtalk didn't materialize initially, for a couple of reasons. One - The home dressing room smelt so bad nobody could really bear being in there for any longer than was absolutely necessary. Two - Nobody really knew what was going off due to the collective drunken stupor. Anyway, onto the field we went with Streaky instructing Worzel to prepare the 'inspirational words of wisdom' to rally the troops at the fall of the first wicket. We didn't have to wait long as Streaky removed Opener Cook for just one. So as we gathered round Eddie began,
"Chaps, we are here today for the people of Calvo (clutching his badge on his Calvo shirt next to his heart). These people love us & we love them, let's give them a cricket team they can be proud of, they are our people. Yes, most of us are hungover, but we've got to put that to the back of our minds & perform cos we are Calvo. Let's do it for the top estate, the poor lads outside The Lion, even for the unfortunates with ASBO's! Come on, we are Calvo"
With everybody now roused to a frenzy, the next 2 hours passed without to much alarm, with Ian & Matt Wright leading the way with the ball & the rare sight of Rick's strides galloping up the hill instead of down it, to great effect. The fielding also was of the highest order, the highlight being Ian Wright's caught & bowled which almost took his hand off. As 40 overs were reached & tea & a sit down beckoned, Bracebridge had been restricted to 139-7.
Scotty & Flea opened our innings and put together a fine stand of 67 until Scotty had enough & decided to run around a straight one & lost his leg stump. Worzel was then true to his words as he joined his big bruvva in the middle & another 40 runs were added until Flea's innings came to an end for a well crafted 45. Robbo's brief cameo yielded 11 which left Pedro enough time to wallop his customary six way over the sightscreen as the target was achieved with five overs remaining. Worzel left the field not out on 27 in floods of tears realising just what he had been part of for the 9,000 or so residents of Calvo!
Hey, there are only five league games remaining on Sundays & we're still top of the league! Granted PCCC have got 243 games in hand, but we still have a chance of winning the thing. Let's remain committed & remember.........We are Calvo!
1st XI Cruise to Comfortable Win
Top of the table status was preserved at GLA with a comfortable victory of relegation candidates Bottesford.
Scotty actually lost a game of flipperty coin & Bottesford elected to bat on another warm, Sunny day. Streaky & Hinault opened up as usual and both were miserly to say the least, with just 21 runs being scored before the 'boy' had to be removed from the attack as he isn't big & strong enough to bowl more than 7 overs at a time yet! Indeed, five of Streaky's overs were maidens & Harry removed one of the Openers. 'Discopants' replaced Streaky and he also bowled a spell tighter than his trousers - 10 overs for 27. Jabba, fresh from his jaunt to 'Northumberland' didn't let the side down as he too produced a fine spell of bowling 10 overs 2-37. As rigor mortice threatened to take over the scoreboard, the total crawled along to 92-3 off 32 overs until Streaky, having had a nice long rest, returned to the attack and was allowed to bowl again (crazy rules). Having twice been on a Hat trick (and deliberately bowling crappy balls so he didn't have to buy a jug), Streaky returned fine figures of 14 overs, 6 maidens, 4-24. Hinault also came back for a little spell at the end and claimed 2-39 from 14 overs.
The fielding was top notch considering the ball never actually reached many of the eleven on the field and Bottesford's total of 140-9 off 48 overs seemed rather inadequate.....And so it proved.
With Creepy sunning himself in Spain (or did he open the batting for Bottesford?!), the McBonkers brothers (Beefy & Pedro) were sent in by Scotty as some rather dark clouds began to gather around GLA. Coupled with the fact that the 'party goers' had to do their hair in readiness for Rick's birthday bash in Mansfield, 140 needed to be knocked off pdq. Whilst Pedro leant on his bat at one end Beefy teed off at the other (32 off just 18 balls)& although he was out in the 5th over, the runs required were already under one hundred! Chunky Jayes replaced Beef but soon departed as Pedro remained somewhat subdued. Scotty came to the middle & remained to the end, Pedro, Ginger Bill & Hodgo the only other casualties as the target was surpassed with 22 overs still left. 6.40pm - 20 points & time to drink thirty twelve zillion pints of ale!
The party assembled outside The Rodney, with the birthday boy looking resplendent in his pork pie hat & a white blouse which was either a) far to tight or b) Rick had false breasts underneath it! Whichever it was, his 'pecs' looked awesome, putting Flea to shame! So, the entourage descended on Mansfield, much ale was drunk, much rubbish was spoken & Ginger Bill thought he was auditioning for the next Dirty Dancing film! After the customary kebab (and a couple of the party leaving 'pavement pizza's), it was off for an early night (3.30am) in readiness for a tough game against Bracebridge the following day.
August Committee Meeting
August's committee meeting will be held at the Pavilion this coming Thursday (3rd August) at 7.15pm.
2nd XI romp home at Wollaton
The 2nd XI stormed to victory away at second placed Wollaton yesterday to leapfrog the hosts in the table and record a comprehensive 5 wicket win. Chris Miller lost the toss and we were asked to bowl first on a dry looking wicket which showed signs of 'crazy paving' on the surface. Wollaton openers Andy Rattray and Tom Chalkley got of to a good start as they made there way to 48 without loss from 10 overs. Ian Wright was then introduced into the attack and duly removed Rattray (36) and former Notts CC man Chris Curzon (5) just after Dickon Perry had removed Chalkley, getting him caught behind. Wollaton then made steady progress and were well placed at 107-4 after 33 overs. But Matt Rankin was then introduced into the attack and he claimed figures of 4 for 8 from 5 overs to rip through the Wollaton middle order, which pegged the hosts right back as we dismissed them for 161 from 43 overs. Openers Matt Handley (37) and Ian Wright (22) got us of to another flier in our reply as we raced to 62 without loss from 8 overs. After losing the said two openers in quick succession Eddie Lee made 23 but was then cleaned up by his mate Tom Chalkley. Jarrod Bell entered the fray and made an excellent 22 not out and was ably assisted by Mark Haseman who made a fantastic 36 not out from only 14 balls to wrap up victory with 15 overs remaining to clinch another vital 20 points and therefore claiming 2nd place in the league table for the first time this season. Full match deatils can be found on the Fixtures/Results page.
End of Season Tour 2006?
Yes, it's a possibility. Rick Considine is busy exploring the possibility of touring at the end of this season.
The proposed dates are: Leave GLA Fri 22nd September, play on the Saturday & Sunday, before returning home Sunday evening.
The location is a much guarded secret to ensure the 'women' don't find out where we're going! Anyway, to keep them guessing, Surrey, Northampton, & North Derbyshire are being considered.
Obviously this ain't gonna happen without sufficient support, so do you want to go or not? Reply via the comments link, or better still, discuss this matter on the forum.
President's Day is back!
Put the date in your diaries - Sunday 6th August, 1.30pm.
After an absence of a few years, Mr Seely will be bringing a team to take on Calverton. It should be a fun day, so make sure you get up to GLA.
Forum Added to Website.
Look under the information section to the left & you'll see 'Forum'. This is the place to talk about 'all things cricket' & 'all things not cricket'! There are 4 sub-sections to the forum, click on it & have a look. You must, however, be registered to post any comments.
So, get registered & get posting!
Sunday XI go joint top!!!
After the Saturday 1st XI were let off by the rain the previous day, the Sunday XI travelled to Balderton dreading playing on what was described during the previous nights drinking as an absolute "bombsite".
This however turned out to be untrue. After a quick inspection by calverton's head groundsman captain Matt was told to bowl if the toss was won. And win he did and into bat went the Balderton openers.
Very tight opening spells from Matt Wright (final figures of 10 overs 2 for 39) and Rick (final figures of 10 overs 1 for 44)Balderton got off to a steady start. Captain Matt then decided he needed a break and brought on Ian Wright (fresh from a shortened two weeks holiday). He must have thought he had made the wrong choice after his first over went for 9 and the Balderton openers looked set. But he was then assured he made the right decision as his next 9 overs went for just 11 runs with two wickets coming from them. (final figures of 10 overs 2 for 20) Other good bowling spells from Tom Wright (1 for 19) and Billy Armstrong (0 for 30) restricted Balderton to 161 from their 40 overs.
After a cracking tea Calverton enjoyed a great start with Rich Lee (63*) and South African Michael Richardson (36) putting on 67. Richo dispatched Balderton's Sri Lankan to all parts with some fine shots showing his high class. Edd Lee and Mark Robinson didn't hang around long, so it was left to Billy (44) to help rebuild the innings with Rich. Billy was finally bowled with the game all but won. Pete Wright (3*) then watched as Flea knocked the winning runs with a straight drive for 4.
A great match which saw the Sunday XI go joint top with Balderton.
Notts v Cheshire at GLA.
On Wednesday 26th July, Nottinghamshire & Cheshire Under 11's will lock horns at Caverton.
Start time is 1.00pm. Any help on the day would be greatly appreciated, be it before, during or after the game.
Thunderstorm wrecks 1st XI's chance of victory!!
A trek to Balderton turned into a nightmare journey as half the team crawled along The Olde Fosse at a pace resembling one of Creepy's innings! Arriving 15 minutes prior to the start wasn't ideal preparation, neither was changing in a 'Nissan Hut' with the temperature approaching 243 Celsius & not a shower in sight!
After another successful game of 'flipperty' Scotty had no hesitation in batting on what turned out to be a 'bombsite'!
With the ball coming through to the batsmen anywhere between shin & 3' above head height, batting turned into something of a lottery. Only Rich Lee was brave enough, skillful enough & fortunate enough (at times), to last any notable length of time. Remembering last years game at 'Baldo' 120 was enough for us to secure victory, who knows, that may have been enough again! With the score on 39-6 the situation did look a little problematic, but by this time 'Ginger Bill' had joined 'Flea' and they were both beginning to look in imperious form! As the score steamed along to 51-6 off 25 overs, a huge storm swamped 'Baldo' (thanks to that silly old sod appearing from under a tree with a brolly in his hand dancing around like a demented giant spider!) As the 'Baldo' players ran for cover, you could here the groans from the 'Calvo' lads muttering about the 'Gods' conspiring to save 'Baldo' from a mauling!
An early tea was taken in some misguided hope that the rain would relent & 'Flea' & 'Ginger Bill' could put 'Baldo' to the sword! Alas, it wasn't to be as day turned into night & the cricket field resembled a lake. However, the entertainment didn't stop there as Bernard Hinault & Pedro put on a display of synchronized grass diving that would have put Jacques Cousteau, Tanya Streeter & Jurgen Klinsmann to shame! "As graceful as a Swan" "It's like watching Torvill & Dean" were comments muttered by the assembled gallery as the two of them made complete pratts of themselves!
So, the 'Get out of Jail free card' has been played & top of the table status preserved, let's hope for better weather next week.
Thunderstorm wrecks 2nd XI's chance of victory
A major electrical storm hit GLA at 4pm today as the 2nd XI were well placed at 142-3 after 30 overs against Gedling Colliery II. Therefore due to the saturated outfield the game was abandoned shortly after. Matt Handley hit 51 and Callum Jayes 39, during the action that took place before the heavens opened.
2nd XI fall to defeat at Southwell
After an excellent run of form in recent weeks the 2nd XI came unstuck away at 'Top Ground' @ Brackenhurst College, Southwell. Having only lost two tosses all season Captain Chris Miller duly called correctly again and decided to bat on what looked to be one of the best batting tracks we have played on so far this season. We didn't get off to the best of starts as openers John Leafe and Matt Handley were both dismissed inside the first 12 overs. But thanks to a partnership of 69 between Jamie Taylor (43) and Chris Miller (31) the ship was steadied somewhat mid innings. But wickets began to tumble as we found ourselves in trouble at 149-6 after 35 overs. Matt Rankin (26) and Martin Handley (21) worked the ball around the ground and managed to maneuver the total upto 201 for Southwell to chase in the evening sunshine. Southwell were off to a flying start in their reply as they raced to 41-2 after 9 overs, but thanks to Dickon Perry, opener Paul Thompson and the in form Stuart Grimley were already back in the pavilion. Southwell rode their luck a little but were always in control of the match there after as they reached their victory target with 5 overs remaining to record a comprehensive 5 wicket victory. A special mention goes to Jarrod Bell who claimed his second high profile scalp of the season. After cleaning up former Nottinghamshire CCC man Paul Todd at Collingham last month he did exactly the same to 'castle' another former Notts batsman Peter Johnson in fine fashion. Full match details can be found on the Fixtures/Results page.
1st XI Match Report - Collingham (Home) July 15th
It seems as though our erstwhile regular scribe has gone A.W.O.L somewhere in Europe, believed The Balearics! All attempts to contact Senor Sewell via phone, e-mails & Interpol have fallen on deaf ears, so this week's match report by our 'mystery guest reporter' will no doubt fall short of his D.H Lawrence esq standards!
Another warm sunny day at GLA saw our 'Top Tosser' again annihilate Collingham's skipper at the throwing the coin in the air game and had no hesitation in batting. With DFD showing his romantic side floating around Venice with his good lady, Creepy & Picko opened the innings in circumspect fashion against what was probably the best bowling attack Calvo had faced this season. A solid stand of 72 in 21 overs laid a decent foundation, before Picko frustratingly 'poked' one to long on for a 'Crawleyesq' 30 off 58 balls in 79 minutes! 'Chunky' Jayes entered the fray albeit briefly as his stumps were disturbed, still at least he could return to the company of his 'other half' where he spent most of the day with his arm around her - it really shouldn't be allowed at the cricket! Scotty joined Creepy, who was still at the crease, & the score moved on to 90 before (shock, horror) Creepy was bowled. Still, a well made 47 from 79 balls and his real heroics were yet to come. 'Ginger Bill' joined the Skipper until he holed out and with the score on 124-4 & overs running out, runs were needed & needed quick. Realising the situation from the middle, Scotty called for 'Jabba The Hun' to join him. Although Scotty perished for 27 (chopping onto his stumps.....again!), Jabba took up the mantle launching some mighty blows in a quickfire 30, eventually holing out attempting to hit one ball to Arnold! The Lee brothers (Pectoral & Worzel) remained till the end & a total of 187-6 was posted. Not a massive score but certainly a challenging one on a wicket offering some assistance to the bowlers.
As the team readied themselves for the fielding stint, there were some real sights for sore eyes in the home dressing room. Not only has Harry taken an unhealthy interest in shaving his own (and anybody else he can get his clippers on) hair - head or otherwise, he is now seen regularly sporting a white pair of 'Bernard Hinault' endorsed lycra cycling shorts! Now whether or not this is purely for cosmetic reasons or not, one can only speculate! In the other corner we have 'Discopants'! Now Rick's strides are rapidly reaching legendary status, but his latest garment quite frankly beggars belief! His natty dark blue headband to keep his long but thinning locks out of his eyes certainly raised an eyebrow or two. Some mentioned a resemblance to D.K Lillee, personally he looked more like a porn star!
So with a giggle & a chuckle at our team members attire we went out to field. 'Hinault' & 'Streaky' took the new ball & a steady start by us saw Streaky snare Collingham's Aussie.....again, and again he didn't want to go! But Pectoral actually appealed & up went the Umps finger. Considering Pectoral spent most of the day complaining about his 'cake like' hands (poof), he has caught (& stumped) rather a lot of people this season. Anyway, back to the game, Collingham progressed to 50-1 in the 18th over until HE was introduced to the attack. What followed was a master class in slow filth bowling by the 'Piemeister' Pete Crawley. Collingham's remaining 9 wickets fell for just 81 runs as Pieman returned the remarkable figures of 10.3 overs 7-36. Whether or not the hot weather had something to do with it I'm not sure, but even the fielding was top drawer with all catches being held (except the dolly 'Ginger Bill' grassed!). Even Creepy caught one off his own bowling & the returning 'Worzel' Lee managed to keep his hair out his eyes long enough to cling on to one (was he too secretly wearing a headband under his hat?).
Collingham bowled out for 131 with 8 overs remaining & a return to winning ways.
An impromptu visit to Town was then arranged with an excellent turn out. Highlights of the evening were 'Discopants' turning up in a little black number (Porkpie hat) looking a bit like Suggs from Madness (or should that be Muggs from Sadness!!??). As the night wore on, most of the group had assembled in the pub formerly known as 'The Quilted Llama' but two couldn't gain entry due to the lateness, one of the unforunates being the 2nd team Vice Captain. Subsequently, the Pub has been renamed again - 'The Jilted Llama'!!
All in all a good day & night, 20 points, 20 pints & 20 lbs of chips!
Are you reading Micky Sewell?
Sunday XI in 'Hard Fought' Win!
A run fest again ensued at GLA as the Sunday XI entertained Collingham on the windiest day in living memory!
Having been inserted, Scotty & Picko put on over a hundred for the first wicket with both scoring half centuries (infact Scotty beat Pedro to the 50 mark - although he did face 19 of the first 20 overs!!). Both were dismissed within an over of each other which left Mark Robinson & Eddie Lee to keep the momentum going, which they did sharing another partnership of almost 100. Robbo notching 56 & Eddie remaining unbeaten on 52 as the innings closed on 250-4 from 40 overs. When was the last time the first 4 batsmen in a Calvo side all scored half centuries? Answers on a postcard please.
Following 'Tel's tea' the Collingham reply got off to a steady start with the opening pair putting on 122 in 26 overs before the fireworks began! A couple of unnecessary 'spats' on the field of play only added to the tension as Collingham pressed the accelerator and seemed to be heading for victory. However, some astute bowling changes at the end of the innings by the 'Streaky One' & a determined effort in the field (special mention to Ian Burton & Will Wright - well fielded lads), saw Calverton home by just 11 runs. Full scorecard can be found on the fixtures/results page.
1st XI Match Report:- Plumtree (Away) July 8th
Oh dear..
Oh dear, oh dear oh dear oh dear.
Our visit to Plumtree, though woefully fruitless from a cricketing perspective, provided plentiful compensation in terms of incident, and ultimately satire. We were so indescribably inept that it became almost pleasurable to be involved in this slap-stick performance. Harold Lloyd, Laurel and Hardy and Buster Keaton would have found a rich vein of inspiration in some of our fielding and the batting performance was so painfully futile, that onlookers thought that it should be videoed, with "Barbers Adagio for Strings" as the soundtrack, and then sent to Steven Spielberg to show him how he could have improved upon the opening scenes of Saving Private Ryan.
That said, back to the so-called cricket and finger pointing. The flippety wizard had left his magic coin back home in Hobbiton and was totally out-witted by the Plumtree skipper who chose to bat first. Our leader has justly berated in the changing rooms for his abject coin-tossing, and he promised never to do it again.
Three overs into the Plumtree innings, Calverton were reduced to 10 men (well, a mixture of fat ageing adolescents and cartoon characters) when the author was cruelly cut down by Plumtree's Steve James. Steve, seeing that the author was wide at mid-on, hatched a fiendish plan to cause him serious injury... "If I just hit the ball three yards to his left, at about 32.6mph he is bound to try and stop it with his foot because in all the years I've played against him, I have never once seen him bend, so he will go for it clumsily with his right foot, and due to his famed lack of agility, will tread on the ball thus causing very significant ankle ligament damage, which will be tough for him, but more importantly, hugely entertaining for the rest of us". Mr James plan worked perfectly and the author was helped from the pitch in excruciating pain, demanding that someone "Hand me my pearl handled revolver!!" After being rushed very slowly to the QMC by his father, the doctor advised that nothing was broken (least of all speed limits. glad it was nothing serious Dad!!) and that the best course of action was to elevate the foot with ice and take plenty of painkillers. So, after collecting the painkillers from the beer isle at Morrison's in Gamston, the author returned to Plumtree to disappointed team-mates who were hoping for an amputation at the very least.
In the author's absence, he was replaced in the field by Junior Jabba, a mini Spartacus who tore about the field and was markedly more effective than the fielder he replaced had ever been in his life...well done Joss! There had been some fluctuating fortunes on the field as Plumtree were at one point 70ish for 6 mainly down to some excellent bowling from the deeply disturbing wanabee barber Tim "Vidal Buffoon" Haines (5-32). Thanks due to some belligerent batting from Mahmood Ali (70) and young keeper Charlie Kingsbury (42) Plumtree closed on 206 all out. Some of our fielding and bowling was below par in the latter stages with Pete Crawley seemingly fielding in some kind of "dexterity vacuum" where he was occasionally visited by others. Rick "Too Tight" Considine picked up three wickets in trousers which seem to have got even more "snug" over the last seven days, it is now possible to see Rick's unborn children through his crotch and the time has surely come to escort him to Terrasports to purchase some more plausible cricket attire, otherwise the author will be unable to take his two young daughters to the cricket anymore.
After tea, there was a major crisis when the author misplaced his bottle opener and the final unopened bottle of Theakstones Old Peculier seemed to be mocking him, but fortunately it was found, an older member of the supporters club was moving menacingly toward an oblivious Flippety with the knife-part but he was apprehended and normal service was resumed. The next crisis lasted for about 2 hours and was called "Calverton's Innings". DFD(4) again mistiming with his Dorothy Perkins "Big Girl" Handbag bat and Pete Crawley (11) was caught chasing a wide one. The team are beginning to prefer Creepy when he didn't play any shots at all...no, on second thoughts ignore that bit. Pedro McBonkers also departed for 11, bowled by a straight one, but visibility is going to be impaired when you are batting in a kilt and a poncho so we'll let him off that one. Scotty(25) was again looking to bat responsibly in his captainy way, until he got a pea-roller which he was unlucky enough to fend off his throat, only to hit the stumps. Ginger Bill (6) was unable to capitalise on last weeks good form and was caught tamely in the covers, Bill then spent the next half an hour going through his own personal hell with the author as the soundboard, not the wisest move, given that the author had been in the company of Messrs Theakston and Thwaite for a couple of hours so the prospects for enlightenment or constructive words of wisdom were bleak to say the least. Calverton still had some hope of getting out of this game without being entirely ridiculed, as Pectoral(33) played cultured straight drives the likes of which are solely the reserve of the mighty and Jabba Snr(18) was looking settled until playing on. Rick Considine straight-armed 13 before one of his elbows bent 3deg and was bowled .Before the circulation had returned to Rick's legs, the game was all over as Streaky was caught behind for 6...All out for 130 rubbish runs and 5 rubbish points.
Plumtree thoroughly deserved their victory every bit as much as we deserve to be horse-whipped in the Rodney car park. We were completely out-played by a very committed and combative side that just seemed to "want it" more. We will certainly have to improve immensely on this week's performance if we don't want to go into freefall. Steve "Assassin" James appears to have put the author out of action for (possibly) the rest of the season so the first XI are faced with the unpleasant prospect of the author and Hodgo spectating together whilst taking lots of "painkillers".
In Majorca till the 21st, see you all on the 22nd. Good luck and stop being rubbish!
2nd XI march on in style
The 2nd XI continued their impressive form at GLA yesterday as we recorded another convincing victory against in form Risley. Chris Miller lost only his second toss of the season as we were asked to bat on another good looking strip. Openers Callum Jayes and Ian Wright started off batting like Chris Gayle and Sanath Jayasuriya obviously feeling that they had to entertain the crowd in '20/20' fashion. A scowling Captain Miller was less than impressed as both men fell in successive overs with the score at 41-2 after 6 overs. A re-building operation was then required as once again Chris 'Red Inker' Miller (74*) played a captains innings ably assisted by Andy Hubbard (64). An excellent total of 242-5 was set for the visitors to chase after tea. We made as shaky in our bowling reply due to the uncertainty of the temperature of the water in the showers for the end of the match, as word filtered through that the gas cylinders had run dry. Never the less Matt Rankin (4-49) took two quick wickets to slow Risley's progress and a tidy spell from Dickon Perry ensured the visitors were hauled back to a respectable rate. A mid order spurt from Risley's Dean Cooper threatened to setup an interesting finish, but he was removed by Ian Wright as Risley's run chase gradually faded away. A special mention must go to youngsters Will Wright and Tom Smithies who both took a wicket apiece. An excellent performance and another 19 points gained. Full match details can be found on the Fixtures/Results page.
July Committee Meeting
Will be held at the ground this coming Thursday (6th July) at 7.30pm.
There is also an Under 15's cup game the same night against Hucknall - 6.00pm start.
The Under 12's fixture scheduled for Wed 5th against Clumber Park has been cancelled as Clumber cannot raise a side.
1st XI win again
1st XI Match Report, July 1st at Eastwood
The latest instalment of the "Chronicles of Calvo" follows another 20-point
haul from a hard-earned victory at the home of our bogey side, Eastwood Town.
Captain Scott of the Shire once again proved he is peerless in the black-art of flippety coin by crushing the Eastwood skipper 1-0, our economy sized skipper again electing to bat first on what looked like a pretty green wicket.
DFD was paired once more with Creepy ( arriving on time in this sightscreen-erection friendly away fixture) with the former providing some moments of drama and controversy. Second ball of the game DFD launched a straight drive at waist high back at the bowler (the same bowler who has hospitalised by Callum at the same ground in the same way last year) and for one split second his bowels must have been doing all manner of gymnastics as last years unpleasant incident was momentarily recalled. Shortly after, DFD appeared to have creamed one to the keeper only to be given not out much to the obvious teapot shaped disbelief of the fielding side. However, the mini-drama was brought to abrupt end (for 13) with a pink-fluffy handbag girl of a mis-hit shot of dubious technical origins and was caught at point.
The normally limpet-like Pete Crawley had departed shortly before for one, a thin edge to the keeper followed by a purposeful and drama-free stride back to pavilion.
McBonkers (who has taken to coolly chewing matches in the manner of Mexican bandits in 1970's spaghetti westerns, he shall now be known as Pedro McBonkers) was joined at the wicket by the flippety wizard, but despite a flurry of boundaries, departed before the dark homicidal demons took hold, mistiming a pie in much the same manner as DFD. Pedro (14) returned to the Pavilion to eat more matches and contemplate growing a big camp moustache.
The flippety wizard had dug in as a mini crisis loomed , and was joined by the author and a promising re-building partnership was taking shape before the latter tried to burst an absolute steak and kidney long hop, only to toe-end it to mid-on (for 17)....a shot so poorly executed, one would imagine it would be hard to repeat, the author can confidently assert that it certainly isn't. Scotty continued to bat very responsibly and picked up the momentum again with some good running with the pectoraly enhanced wicketkeeper who was looking particularly well defined as his mighty torso lent exquisite timing to his shots. Richie's improvement as both a batsman and a keeper is proving invaluable this season, and with limbs growing ever more mighty by the week, we are going to have to change his nickname from flea to something more reflective of his stature...ideas to the blog please.
Richie was caught at mid-wicket (as is his desired mode of dismissal) for 18 but his dismissals are always easy on the eye in that they are normally as a result of the slight mistiming of proper cricket shots as opposed to the eccentric uncoordinated heaves of some of the elder statesmen in the side. Flippety was a little disappointed (the ball may, or may not have been caught on the half volley) to be caught in the covers for an excellent captainy styled 51 which up to this point had held the innings together.
Streaky somehow got himself bowled for one and the stage was set for some excellent lower order batting.
Billy Armstrong, coming in at number eight and making his debut for the first team, added some real urgency to proceedings with extremely energetic running between the wickets and excellent shot selection. Billy looked totally at home against the bowling and looked as if he had played at this level for years. Billy shared an excellent partnership of 49 with Jabba (during which Jabba lost 3 stone in weight). Jabba was caught for 13 though nobody can remember where, but the author surmises that the chances are that it may well have been somewhere in the "wide mid-wicket region". Rick Considine had been hurriedly getting himself sewn into his "15 denier" cricket tights when he went out the join Calvo's fledgling "Collingwood" .
Rick takes an almighty swing at the ball, and in the words of an amused Jabba "He doesn't leave much behind does he?" and when he connects it stays hit. Rick, smashed a flat six over mid-wicket without even bothering to bend his arms, he has a strange Olympic Hammer thrower style of swinging himself of his feet and though it is unorthodox, it is priceless entertainment and much admired.
As the innings drew to a close (201-9), Billy continued to play with a controlled aggression with completely legitimate and sound shots all around the wicket, and with 3 needed to reach 50 off the last ball of the innings, he drove to the mid-wicket boundary to round off an excellent innings, made all the better because it was achieved in front of a very proud grandfather
After tea (which was excellent by the way....marshmallow snowballs....yumyumyum). Calvo's Streaky one and Hainsy (3-51.....51?...HOW MANY?!) bowled extremely well with the only runs really coming from risky shots from the openers as they got a bit "strangled". Streaky (2-39)beat the bat repeatedly and early wickets were taken but Eastwoods run rate picked up as some good middle order batting batting kept them in the chase. After Streaky had been removed from the attack because he is clearly too weak to bowl more than seven overs in one spell, he was replaced by Rick Considine (0-21) who's determination to don almost impossibly tight cricket trousers has become something of an issue at the club. If local (naughty) literary legend DH Lawrence ever saw Rick's cricket trousers, he would have been inspired to write novels of their exploits which would, in the interests of good taste, never have seen the light of day. Rick made a vital contribution when, toiling in his trousers on the deep extra-cover boundary, Eastwoods best and most dangerous batsmen on the day, holed out to Rick, who juggled the ball slightly as sparks flew from between static-charged thighs. Pete Crawley (3-22) again bowled an excellent spell full of guile, control and height as did Flippster (1-21) (but without the height bit). Pectoral took four catches but missed a couple of half chances. Calvo did look to be on course for a quite splendid defeat as Eastwood were 116-4 with 20 overs remaining but as has happened throughout the season to date, everyone hung in there and bowled and fielded well throughout....Creeps took a remarkable catch of his own bowling ("well, if you're going to take a catch it may as well be...ect..ect..")....Eastwood were eventually bowled out for 169 and we all ran upstairs in the hope that some lager would appear....and it did!!.
All in all, a good result, excellent debut knock from young Billy (I imagine he will get about 152* someday soon) and a gritty knock from the skipper all backed up by everything in the field being done very competently......half way through the season, we haven't lost a game yet, Pedro's got a double ton and the author has only been run out 3 times.....what a bizarre first half of the season....keep it going chaps.
Man Of The Match....Billy Armstrong.
Moment of the Match.....Rick "Too Tight" Considine's six (without bothering to use his elbows).
Billy - DO be a hero!
It's difficult to put into words the Sunday XI's game at Papplewick, so let's try a bit of a 'sing-song' instead. For those of you who are old enough, cast your mind back to 1974 when Nottingham band Paper Lace had a hit with 'Billy Don't Be A Hero' for those of you who cannot remember this (shame on you!)
The Calvo team went marching up Main Street,
They went to play at Papplewick Hall,
We looked across & there we saw Billy,
Waiting to go in at number three,
And with his young head upon his shoulders,
He strode out to the crease,
From where we stood he looked so determined,
As he struck one hundred & fifty two!
Billy, DO be a hero, do be a God with your bat,
Billy, DO be a hero, & you will please Captain Matt,
And as Billy started to score, Matt said just one fifty odd more,
Billy, DO be a hero, score them for me!!!
Having been threatened not to return to the Dressing Room if he lost the toss, Matt 'did the biz' and Papplewick were 'invited' to field as the mercury touched 140 (in the shade!).
Flea & Scotty were soon parted as Scotty got the only ball that did anything all day & his stump almost impaled the stumper!
Enter stage left........Billy.
It's difficult to put into words what followed in the next 2 & a half hours, as Flea & Billy put on 209 for the second wicket as the ball disappeared to all parts & the 'scampering' between the wickets even tired out the watching players & spectators!
Flea's innings came to an end on 65 made from just 85 balls providing an ideal foil to the slightly more flamboyant Billy 'Do You Burn' Armstrong! (Yes Flea he does burn!!!) Anyway Billy cruised into the 90's & was made to wait on 99 as Pipplewack's rather large bowler insisted on making the ball bounce 23 feet over Billy's head! Still all things come to those who wait & Billy duly clocked up his maiden century & having been joined by Captain Matt, put on another 50 odd. As the innings closed after 40 overs, Billy returned to his teammates with 152 not out to his name made from 130 balls, with 18 four's & 1 six out of a Calvo total of 282-3.
Following tea, Skipper Wright & Darryl Willemse (who can actually turn the ball - are you reading Creepy) took 6 wickets between them as the Hosts were bowled out for 204.
A memorable day for all those present at the ground, congratulations to Billy - may it be the first of many.
Ian finds form at the Wright time
On the day when the England football team crashed out of the World Cup against Portugal on penalties (again), Ian Wright raised spirits at GLA with a career best innings of 99 as the 2nd XI stormed home by 92 runs against Stanton & Awesworth. Captain/Wicketkeeper Chris Miller won the toss yet again and elected to bat on a scorching afternoon. We were off to a stuttering start as John Leafe was dismissed with just 36 on the board. With Pete Wright missing the game through illness, 'Young Wrighty' made hay in the sunshine, surviving a dropped catch early in his innings to crash his way to 99 in a partnership of 120 with run machine Chris Miller who made 75 as we made our way to an excellent 241-4 from 45 overs. In reply Stanton lost a wicket in the first over as Mark Haseman (4-21) removed opener Barnes for a duck. Stanton were well and truly in the hunt at one stage as they were 105-4 after 26 overs. But then Matt Rankin (3-47) removed the dangerous Chris Marshall for 32 and Matt Winfield for 45 and Stanton's run chase ground to a halt after that as wickets fell at regular intervals. Stanton were bowled out for 149 which secured us another 20 points therefore making it 4 wins from the last 5 matches. Highlight of the afternoon was a well struck six from Mark Haseman which sailed onto the roof of the Pavilion. Full match details can be found on the Fixtures/Results section.
Man of the Match:- Ian Wright
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